Imagine being told you’re an addict, a control addict. What is a control addict, you might ask? Are you a control addict?
Find out more… in my Monkeytraps book review.
First, a little background
My therapist, Steve Hauptman, published a book called Monkeytraps: Why Everybody Tries to Control Everything and How We Can Stop in Dec 2015. I realised there aren’t many reviews done when I did a quick search online. This is my shout out for him and his book. More people need to know about it and get their hands on it!
It is a life manual of sorts; a guide to Life, if you will.
Steve’s expertise is “control addiction”, meaning, the addiction to control. This is his take on Codependency.
In the book, he says:
This is a book about control in general, and psychological monkeytraps in particular. A psychological monkeytrap is any situation that tempts us to hold on when we should let go — to control what either cannot or should not be controlled.
In this book you’ll learn:
- Why everyone is addicted to control
- How this addiction causes most—if not all—of our emotional problems
- How to listen to feelings instead of controlling them
What I like about the Monkeytraps book
All 99 chapters are around 2 – 4 pages each. Which is great for me! I have a short attention span, and also have problems digesting lengthy and tedious information. I am unable to follow texts that are too long. So these super short chapters are perfect.
The chapters don’t necessarily have to be read in succession. Just look at the Contents page and pick topics you’re interested in, or chapter titles that pique your interest. Each chapter stands alone on its own and does not require reading of the previous chapter to make sense. I’m guessing reading Chapter 1 through to Chapter 99 could be the best way, but I was fine not reading the chapters in order.
A sampling of chapter titles include: “Choiceful and Compulsive”, “Five Weeds”, “The Risk of Feeling”, “The Kid in the Closet”, “Practice”, “Tribe”, “Lightbulb”…
Steve writes in simple, succinct paragraphs. He makes possibly complex psychological concepts and theories easy to understand. It is almost an art, how he cuts through all the psychobabble and simplifies all this information. He writes to the point, just like how he speaks, during therapy.
And I must add, he likes to take the monkey mickey out of himself, people and situations. Quoting a reviewer on Amazon: “And as writer, I will aspire to Steve’s clarity, organization, brevity and humor.”
There are lovely illustrations in the book too, all done by Steve. It’s a pity they’re not in colour!
(Some of the coloured versions of the illustrations from the book — courtesy of Steve Hauptman.)
What I don’t like about the Monkeytraps book
I wish the illustrations in the book were in colour!
I can’t think of anything I don’t like about the book. In fact, I feel like buying one for everyone I care about, so they can read it and have a better understanding of themselves and the world around them — Life itself!
You may not like this book if…
- You prefer books that read like a novel — this book is almost like an instructional guide
- You are not prepared to consider yourself a control addict — Steve asserts all human beings are, to varying extents
- You don’t wish to get in touch with your FEELINGS — this book talks about feelings that you may have been ignoring!
Personally, through my recovery, I was made aware that I’ve been suppressing my feelings for a long, long time. It was devastating, and I can understand how that can put one in a vulnerable and uncomfortable position. Not everyone is prepared to face their own feelings.
Author: Steve Hauptman
Paperback: 374 pages
Publisher: Lioncrest Publishing (December 20, 2015)
Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.8 x 8.5 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars (9 customer reviews)
Price: Paperback, US$17.99 (Used, from US$13.64); Kindle version, US$9.99
I highly recommend this book to people boggled with the questions about Life, themselves and the people around them. And I’m not (entirely) saying this because I’m biased!
The writing style is matter-of-fact, cut to the chase, simple to understand. BUT, the content is tough to swallow sometimes… due to the many truths that are revealed.
If you want an honest glimpse of yourself, this book is for you. I guarantee you many “aha” moments when reading Monkeytraps. It can be life-changing, if you let it.
So, go ahead and check out Monkeytraps!
Quoting the book…
(It is) filled with actionable insights you can start using today. Monkeytraps is a must-read for anyone seeking HAPPINESS, HEALTHIER RELATIONSHIPS and more PEACE OF MIND.
I hope you liked my Monkeytraps book review. Let me know if you have any questions, feedback or comments below.
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